Midnight Mama

Pre-eclampsia, pandemic, and post-partum. Not the ideal "mocktail" for a new mama.

This week on the Birthing Her series I had the honor of sitting down with the CEO of Melanated Vibes, Billie J.  Billie and I first bonded in our neighborhood where our first babies were growing and playing with one another; right before I moved out of the neighborhood.  We re-connected during COVID, having our second children close together. Then the universe continually brought us together at the local 711, CVS, and local school, so were finally able to have a sit-down, catch up, and cheer one another one in this new endeavor.
Billie shares her experience with pregnancy, pre-eclampsia, and postpartum and I KNOW this is going to resonate with so many mamas out there especially regarding the lack of education and preparation.  We dove into maternal health disparities and inequities, and sharing of resources, and Billie provides solid education and guidance around pre-eclampsia. 
 
You can find more information about pre-eclampsia here in an article from Johns Hopkins
Billie is a public relations and communications strategist with over 15 years of experience working on several critical issues such as climate change, global health, international security, human rights, and global women’s issues. Billie is particularly interested in the application of public relations to social issues and her passion for communications is focused on creating positive change and improving people’s lives. Currently, Billie works as a health communications specialist focusing on maternal and child health reducing health disparities and improving health equity for mothers, children, and families.  Billie is also the owner and CEO of Melanated Vibes, an apparel and accessories brand that celebrates Black culture through affirming fashion pieces that inspire and empower. Through her “Shop for Change” initiative, Billie donates a portion of Melanated Vibes’ proceeds to nonprofit and advocacy organizations that are working to address issues of equality, equity, and social justice. Billie has a B.S. in psychology an M.S. in management and public relations and additional training in leadership and human capital management. Billie is a wife and a mom of two.
 

Pregnant while Postpartum. Navigating hormones, mental health, and a career with Julia Batman

Expanding your family is a blessing, filled with the challenges of balancing it all.  What makes it more challenging is when you are starting to see the light in the postpartum period and find yourself navigating motherhood all over again.  Tune into this episode with my girl Julia Batman as she transparently shares her current journey of being pregnant while postpartum and how things have been different for her this time around.  From returning to work and the challenges associated with pumping, to transitioning into a remote position just in time to experience morning sickness again, she bares it all.
For more information on The Pump Act, follow this link here.
You can find Julia on IG @ Julia_batman_
Julia Batman is a 30-year-old wife and mom of a sweet 1-year-old girl and has another baby girl due to arrive in September. She lives in Pennsylvania, practices as a Clinical Pharmacist, and is also a pet mom to her dog Mifflin, and her cat Philly. She loves motherhood more than anything and is learning to embrace the highs and lows of this period of growing her family.

Just because you "could" doesn't mean you "should." How this mentality can lead to exhaustion and burnout.

I love feeling unstoppable, especially as a mother.  There have been times when I felt like I could do it all and thrived in that space at one point.  I could pump while I was working, send emails while I rocked my babies to sleep, and even snuck in a workout on my lunchbreak when sleeping in was more important for my health.  The same things that made me feel unstoppable also contributed to my exhaustion and negatively impacted my mental health at one point in my journey.  Today I share my experience with feeling like I "should" do things because I "could" and how leaning into that message can be detrimental to your growth as a mother.  
 
As always, if you wish to connect email me @ nkumi@thewholemom.com
www.thewholemom.com
IG nicole_kumi
 

Are your walls keeping someone out, or something in? Learning to lower my walls so that my daughter can see me clearly.

This was a tough episode to record, and ironically, I had intended to go a whole other direction.  One thing about me is that I go based on my feelings and flow, and something about this current season of struggle I am in was necessary to share for a few reasons.
I am a product of my coaching services and believe strongly in the power of speaking up and out about what is truly going on in my life to validate or encourage another mother, and more importantly, my daughter.
Tune in as I share openly about her diagnosis, our current situation, and how it has allowed us to draw strength from one another and be more powerful than ever before.
I hope she listens to this one day so she can fully understand the power of our love.
Drop me a note of inspiration in the comments if this resonates with you.

It's lonely over here. How paternal mental health is being impacted by the fourth trimester.

As we scratch the surface related to maternal mental health and the importance of adequate and accessible education and resources for moms, I can't help but think about our dads who have yet to enter the conversation.  I recognize it is one slow step at a time, and my work with moms highlights the need for MORE work with dads, creating that same space that allows them to be vulnerable and get some assistance with the postpartum process too.  Tune in as I discuss my thoughts around this and what I am personally doing to help dads that are "new here" with very little resources.  I am constantly reminded of my own husbands strength, love, patience, and resilience, that was displayed with very little support or guidance.  
 
My mission as the Founder of The Whole Mom is to provide moms with everything they need on their journey through pregnancy and beyond, and that includes services for Dads.
 
Here is a handy toolbox for Dad to get familiar with and work with mom to build off of.
Dads Toolbox

The hardest part about motherhood was the "birth", and not the one you might think.

Learning to become a mother all while BEING a mother was a wild concept for me to wrap my head around.  There was a conflict occurring internally everyday for almost two years as I was trying to figure out what was happening.  I have never been the same since I became a mom, and I am thankful for that because who I became was the right person for the job and I am glad I recognized that she needed to be let out in order to perform.  Tune in as I share my experience and some helpful tips for moms at any stage of their journey who are feeling "conflicted" and resistant to the impending changes ahead.
 
If you are interested in sharing your story and being a guest on Midnight Mama please follow this link to complete a questionnaire.  
 
If you want to download your free guide to Birthing Her, follow this link.

The real reason why moms are so tired and what to do about it.

"I'm tired" is one of the most used phrases in motherhood, and its common use tends to distract people from the real reason behind why moms are tired.  It's not motherhood or our children, it goes much deeper than that and I explore all of that in this episode as well as solutions for it.  As noted in the show, I am inviting each listener to join my new community for moms, The Nest, for just 1$ for an entire YEAR.  Follow the link below to join, or email me with any questions.
Join The Nest here
Email me with any questions.  Nkumi@thewholemom.com

Postpartum is not a diagnosis. It's a period of time

We tend to put every mother who is struggling with her transition into motherhood, into the same box and label it as "postpartum" without realizing that is incorrect.  I get down to the specifics related to the postpartum timeframe and how the appropriate language and diagnosis is crucial as it relates to supporting moms with their mental health.  Every mother goes through the "postpartum period" and not every mother will experienced perinatal mood and anxiety disorders...learn the difference so you can be helpful.
 
As always, if you are in need of more support follow this link and let's set up a free consult to talk more about that.
 
If you are a mom looking for a safe space to get some support in a larger setting I invite you to follow this link and explore my community for moms, The Nest.
If you are in need of some guidance and support understanding the process and finding your footing in motherhood follow this link to my free guides and checklists.

What happens when everything falls apart and you CHOOSE to rise.

What happens when you experience a set back or feel like everything has fallen apart?  How do you stay positive and protect your mental health?  It can be easy to fall into a depressed state choosing to isolate and allow your frustrations consume you, and I am feeling that lately.  Tune in as I share my recent setback, how I am choosing to tackle it and why it is important that you pay attention to the warning signs.  Sometimes you're exceeding the speed limit and you're not even aware; that's an issue.
 
Let's chat
 

Protecting your mental health during the ”danger zone.”

With the holiday season behind us, it can be attractive to settle into a minimalist role as it relates to your physical and mental health.  The period between January and March can be considered the "danger zone" as it relates to mental health, primarily maternal mental health.  You may have been riding the holiday wave for a while, not noticing everything that has been happening around you, and now that the dust has cleared you recognize you have some work to do.  Tune in and listen to my explanation of this "season" and some tips you can utilize to ensure you make it through the next 3 months as the healthiest version of yourself.
 
As referenced in the episode:  Free 30-day trial of The Nest, a community for EVERY MOM linked here